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I think the "below children" setting in the Style inspector does what you're asking for. Unfortunately, there's a bug in the current version such that the view is not redisplaying to immediately reflect changes to that setting - something else has to happen and force a refresh before you will see the new spacing. (Collapsing and then expanding a group is one way to force it to redisplay with the new spacing.) This bug is on our radar, but since it is affecting you, I would encourage you to send in a bug report to reinforce that it's an issue for you.

As for adding padding only below certain rows, that was lost when we simplified the padding and spacing to make it easier for people to get consistent, predictable spacing. (There were certain commonly-desired layouts that were disappointingly difficult to achieve in OO3.) A workaround is to just have an empty row (an approach we believe people were already using). If that isn't a good solution for you, please send in a feature request. (And it's possible that you may still be able to accomplish this with AppleScript; our support team should be able to let you know if so.)