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Search Mac Help on your computer for the "creating a computer-to-computer network" information. If you set one up and have your iPhone connect to that in preference to your 'normal' wireless network, does the sync succeed?

Problems like this generally boil down to either a firewall on the Mac that's blocking the sync connection, or some idiosyncracy of the way the wireless network is set up. It's generally a bit too complex to troubleshoot on the forums; please include the info I asked for above in an email to the support ninjas, who can try to help.